Some of us have no gift for moderation. I'm not sure why, but I think it has to do with an inherent lack of optimism, at least, in my case. And where that came from, by stars or disposition or myriad schoolyard traumas, I have no idea. I admire those who can swim easily between extremes, steady and breathing, enjoying either the yes or the no.
I do have a gift for going cold turkey, for which I am grateful. Abstinence from all indulgence really seems the easiest path--if there is no temptation, then there is no struggle. If there's no struggle, then there is no heavy emotional messiness to haul up and carry around. I love anticipation, but not the end of things--the piece of chocolate cake, the holiday, the trip to Alaska/Europe/the Caribbean, the relationship, the phone call, the book.
The end becomes so overwhelming, so all-encompassing, that it's easiest, really, either never to begin, or to have a spare experience always waiting in the wings.