Deep peace of the quiet earth to you. 

What's the worst?

February 12, 2018

 

Those of us with anxiety are incredible storytellers. It's not that we're lying or that we're not logical, strictly speaking, but that we misidentify the trigger--everything that comes after that misidentification is perfectly logical, but that initial story that trips us up, sets us off. 

 

Whatever the stimuli is--a headache, a cryptic email from one's boss/partner, a new social situation--becomes colored and twisted by a very active, if sensitive, inner landscape. The headache becomes meningitis, the email a lay-off/break-up, the party 100% guaranteed to end in some disaster of social humiliation. The actions we take following those thoughts--symptom-checking on the internet, arriving at our boss's office/partner's lunch date in a right state of panic, spending the entire party in the corner (if we show up at all)--are a completely logical response to the thought that came before--IF that initial thought were grounded in reality. 

 

Put it this way--we anxious people, we well-wired (if bent) little walking antennae, pick up the initial signal from the initial trigger and wrap it around ourselves so tightly, we cut off all sensation--breath, blood, nerves. At that point, who *wouldn't* panic? So that first story, that FIRST story. Can we catch it? Can we just *see* if there's a possibility of another plotline? Another explanation? Can we just entertain that, if only for a moment? And then a moment longer? And then just a smidge longer? And can we eventually decide that not every situation is a red alert?

 

And if so, can we finally sleep at night and wake in the morning without wondering what small thing will stop our heart this time?

 

 

 

 

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